Feel like SIL doesn't trust me
Hi everyone
I'm an aunty to a beautiful 20mth old boy. I'm also his godmother. I absolutely adore this little darling and treasure any time I get with him.
In the first few months of his life I was asked to look after him a bit, I got to say spend a few hours looking after him whilst his Mum got her hair done or went to the beautician, etc. So I would feed him, burp him, change him, put him to bed,etc. It was so lovely!! Then it stopped, I was accused of not seeing him enough, that he didn't know me (!!?) huh? I saw him every week. I was really sick with the flu once and couldn't see him for a few weeks, I was contagious for gods sakes, didn't want him to get sick. That's when I was accused of not seeing him enough, that I couldn't mind him because he didn't know me, that he had changed and kept changing and I wouldn't know what he needed/wanted etc. It was so sad. His mother became so mean in a lot of ways. Would accuse me (& my Mum sometimes) of basically not knowing the right thing to do with him ... controlling to the enth degree. We would be scolded "don't make that face!" "don't laugh, you're scaring him!" "don't ..... this, don't that!" We couldn't do anything right.
Catch 22 situation - not allowed to spend 1-1 time with him but also accused of not spending enough time with him ... being set up for failure basically.
So I had to resign myself to the fact that she just didn't/doesn't trust me with him. Anytime they need him minded, they ask my Mum or a babysitter they barely know!! I'm NEVER asked anymore, not ever. It hurts, a lot. To go from being told how good I was with him and how much of a natural I was to *boom* ... nothing, is really hard. I've had to work hard at coming to terms with the fact that I won't be asked to mind him and just focus on enjoying the time I do see him, even though she watches over my shoulder the whole time. I will be having a giggle with him and she come in a swoop him up and away from me 
There's another bub on the way and we're all excited. I'm so so hoping she will not go down the same path and make things so hard and painful for me ... I'd be interested in hearing other Aunty's tips and ideas on how to deal with this!
Thanks!