Thank you all for your kind replies. I appreciate each and every one of them!
We are all doing...ok. My brother and sister in law are still a mess, and so is my mom, so I found myself in charge of making cremation arrangements and handling funeral home details, which is something I never, ever thought I would do. But I did- because someone has to.
The reason I want to find a group just for aunties is that I find myself experiencing a different kind of grief than my brother/sister-in-law (who lost a child), and my mom/dad (who have a child experiencing tremendous pain, and have also lost a grandchild). I find myself in the position of being the only one who is able to make decisions, handle tough choices, and make arrangements, while at the same time, pretending like I'm not completely destroyed inside because SOMEBODY has to pick a funeral home and SOMEBODY has to go pick up the pictures from the hospital and SOMEBODY has to file all of the cremation paperwork. It's almost like it's...a postponement of grief. I've had my moments, but I know that sometime soon, it's going to hit me hard.
Tomorrow I 'get' to go pick up my nephew's remains. My beautiful, full term, 9 lb, 21 inch, black haired, brown eyed, chubby nephew who just happened to get his umbilical cord wrapped around his neck as he was moving down to the birth position. G-D damn it.