I received an email recently about teens and texting, and almost fell out of my chair.  For the second year in a row, the folks at popular social texting app textPlus surveyed 1,155 13-17-year-olds, and this is what they found:

40% of teens said they would consider asking their date to prom by text.

66% of teens said they would accept a date to prom if asked by text.

Parents, Aunties, Uncles, Godparents, Friends and Family: what have we done wrong that a sentimental adolescent rite of passage such as a high school prom has arrived at this place? Suddenly our daughters and nieces are supposed to get excited about being asked to the prom through a cell phone text? Seriously? This is not only bad life etiquette, but in fact, we’re essentially depriving our teens one of the rawest of life experiences, we’re denying them the opportunity to feel every emotion that is connected to asking and being asked to the prom: facing fear, contemplating rejection, anticipating elation, and pure vulnerability.

Kids need to practice the art of showing up and asking for what they want or need, and learn that not every aspect of life results in immediate gratification. As far as I know, you still can’t get a job, a driver’s license or be accepted into college via text. One day soon, teens are going to be faced with an in-person interview and fall flat on their faces, because they have no idea how to talk to anyone face-to-face. How does that sit with you?

If we aren’t taking part in teaching our kids the proper behavior surrounding some of these precious moments in life, who will? These rites of passage happen once in our lives, and it would be such a shame for teens to miss out on the true experience.

Nephews, pull up your big boy jeans, put on your coolest kicks and walk on over to that beautiful, deserving young girl you’ve had your eye on for months, leap into the unknown and accept what lies ahead of you like a young man. Go ahead–ask her.

5 Reasons You Shouldn’t Ask a Girl (or Boy) to Prom via Text:

Shoddy Shortcuts: All those shortcuts are confusing, and no one wants to go to the prom with someone who can’t hold a conversation.

Multiple Mix-Up: By chance you think it’s a bright idea to text multiple dates “just in case,” not so fast, girls talk, they will eventually find out and you’ll end up going solo anyway.

The Snooze Buttons: There is no witty way to ask a girl out via text, it all seems boring and uncreative, trust me.

Lost in Transit: Your text may get lost and you’ll sit around wondering if she ever received it and you’ll be right where you started, dateless.

Missed Opportunities: While you’re figuring out how to word your text, some other guy is asking her in person, and she is saying yes right now.

Final Texting DOs, Not DON'Ts: Definitely text photos of yourself trying on outfits to friends for feedback, send your parents a photo from prom, and make plans for prom with your group of friends.

Have a GR8 time.

Published: May 3, 2011