Holiday Stress Got You Down?
Written By Savvy Auntie Staff Writers
By Dr. Rachel Busman, PsyD, Child Mind Institute: Anxiety and Mood Disorders Center
We know from iconic movie references (cue sleigh bells and snowflakes) that the holidays are supposed to be a relaxing time when families get together, old friends toast the New Year, and kids sled down snow-blanketed hills and emerge with rosy cheeks, asking for cocoa—right?
Not really. Now, I’m not trying to be a Scrooge here. Winter vacations can be a really great time for adults (who can get the time off from work) to recharge their batteries, perhaps do a much needed reorganization project, and enjoy some down time.
And some kids seem to love vacation, but the notion that everyone is full of holiday cheer is wishful thinking. I have worked with countless kids and families who tell me that, mid-week, they just want to get back to the normal routine of everyday life!
What’s an aunt to do?
Here are some tips on how to back up the parents and help keep the little ones happy, healthy, and engaged during the holiday season.
1. Keep daily routines.
Obviously there are going to be instances when this is not possible, but overall, sticking to normal routines that mirror what usually occurs helps keep kids on track. When they come over to Auntie’s for a visit, set times for various activities like playtime, quiet reading time, and snack time.
2. Respect your budget.
If you are spending some time off with the kids, this doesn’t mean you have to break the bank. Check out what programs are being offered at the library and other local venues. Some movie theaters may offer special matinee prices, and doing a movie night at your home can be just as fun. (Check in with parents on the kids’ bedtimes!) Use this as a chance to remind your nieces and nephews that they are likely to have just gotten some gifts for Hanukkah or that Santa may be coming soon.
3. Plan playdates.
If possible, find out which kids will also be home during the holidays. This is a great opportunity to plan some play dates or fun winter outings with Auntie without the pressures of school work and regular schedules.
4. Have quiet time.
Enjoy the hustle and bustle of activity—but having a little adult-imposed downtime is important, too. Tell the kids, “For the next 30 minutes, we are all going to take some time to relax on the couch.” Help the little ones pick a book or a quiet game to do.
5. Monitor that screen time.
Kids may be very excited to have time to watch TV, play video games, or be on the computer. Be smart about this and maintain balance when they come over for a visit. Talk to their parents about which devices are okay, institute some rules about how much screen time is allowed and then suggest other non-digital activities to enjoy.
Lastly, invite the kids to tell you how they want to spend their time with you. They may have some very good ideas; jot them down, elaborate on them, and have FUN!
Rachel Busman, PsyD, is a clinical psychologist specializing in the evaluation and treatment of anxiety and mood disorders in children and adolescents. Dr. Busman has extensive experience providing cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to children, teenagers, and young adults struggling with psychiatric disorders, school difficulties, and behavioral problems. She has specific interest and expertise in the treatment of obsessive-compulsive disorder, separation anxiety, specific phobias, and selective mutism.
Photo: cafemama via Flickr cc
Published: December 24, 2013