http://savvyauntie.com/ SavvyAuntie.com - the first community for cool aunts, great aunts, godmothers and all women who love kids Copyright 2008 SavvyAuntie.com www.ballooningnesteggs.com

The Ballooning Nest Eggs website seeks to disrupt the notion that building youngsters’ nest eggs is strictly a close family affair and connecting kids to their money—and broader economic and global world—is more akin to homework than play time. Our site is full of practical yet “out of the nest” ideas to grow youngsters’ wealth and encourage them to dive into investing, entrepreneurship, charitable giving and their broader economic world. It brings much-needed fun and imagination to these topics, making them relevant to kids' lives (as well as yours).

When kids go into business together—and actually turn a profit—do you encourage them to keep it or give it to charity? Here’s how two 8-year-old friends decided what to do with the cha-ching from their T-shirt business.

Most times, when kids start a business, you don’t need to give much thought to the money they make. After all, roadside lemonade stands aren’t putting Pepsi out of business, and backyard puppet shows don’t have the Man of Steel quaking in his cape at the box office. But when young entrepreneurs do launch a business that pulls down some serious cash, do you let them pocket it or urge them to do good by giving the money to a deserving charity?

Such was the quandary for Hank Whalen and his best friend, fellow 8-year-old Evan Eberle. The pair’s T-shirt company—which featured the positive message, “Don’t Go Below Zero”—was founded when their respective families were dealing with serious illnesses at the same time. Hank wanted to donate all proceeds to pancreatic cancer because his grandfather was diagnosed with the disease last year. Evan, on the other hand, wanted to deposit the funds and build wealth.

Both are respectable, important objectives, so for a solution we turned to Cindy Senning, EdD, great-granddaughter of Emily Post and the director of the Emily Post Institute in Burlington, Vt. “Similar to what adults do, it’s okay for kids to donate a percentage of their business income to charity and use the rest to pay expenses, put into their savings account or spend on something special.”

In the end, Evan came around to thinking that donating a portion of the profits to charity was the thing to do. But the initial impasse pointed to what time has proven: Hank and Evan make good business partners because they complement one another. Hank has a generous heart, while Evan has the instincts to turn a profit and build a successful T-shirt empire.

Encourage Them To Give Back

If your little money-making nieces and nephews are still resistant to giving some of their hard earned ba-bling away, try getting them involved in picking the organization they want to support, suggests Senning. “Encourage kids to go online and explore places that are relevant to what is happening in their life,” she says. “Teach kids how to research groups that aid children who want to play soccer in third world countries, for instance, or point them toward animal shelters if they love and can relate to animals.” Or tell them about World Bicycle Relief, a group that provides bikes to people in rural areas of Africa where two-wheeled transportation is a lifeline to clean water, education, healthcare, markets, and jobs. Kids get the benefits of “bike riding” because it’s fun and something they do every day.

Convincing children they should give back has life-long benefits, says Kay Shamitz, partner, Skills for Living in Norwell, MA. “The amount you teach kids to give to charity varies from family to family, but it’s important to build in the concept of giving from an early age,” says Shamitz. “In the long run, kids feel like they’ve contributed something meaningful. It also sets up a positive habit for life. Kids are natural helpers, and teaching them to help financially empowers them.”

Philanthropic work is also the basis for building character, something Savvy Aunties want to instill in their nieces and nephews. “The act of giving from your business teaches kids to have respect for others, which, in turn, builds self-respect,” says Senning. “It also gives kids a chance to create non face-to-face relationships with other people across the nation and the world, which is the foundation of good manner and etiquette, and being a good person.”

Here are more tips for getting your budding business executives to give:

1. Break it down.
Suggesting that kids donate 10 percent of net profits to charity is a great place to start. Use simple math, such as $10 for every $100 earned goes to a charity of choice. Increase or decrease as the business grows or declines.

2. Guide by age.
Younger kids will do better with limited, action-oriented choices. For example, set aside a certain amount of the profits to buy groceries and then drop off those groceries together at a food pantry. “This way, kids can ‘see’ and then ‘do,’” says Shamitz. “Make donations a regular part of your family routine versus a big ‘hurrah’ moment of self-congratulation.”

3. Point to other successful entrepreneurs.
Show kids how billionaire Bill Gates donates his time and money to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, which believes every person deserves the chance to live a healthy, productive life. This could also inspire kids to create their own fund to support different causes each year or a single mission that’s a personal passion, such as rescuing endangered species.

4. Suss out charities.
In addition to letting kids pick their favorite charity, encourage them to research different organizations and determine if they are legitimate. Kids can link to CharityNavigator.com to find trustworthy philanthropic groups.

5. Make it timely.
If an ongoing effort is too much, help with natural disaster relief efforts like those for Hurricane Sandy. Or, determine “all proceeds this month” go to certain current events, such as the One Fund in Boston to support the Boston Marathon bombing victims. “Kids can be bothered by what they hear on the radio or see on television, and rather than be bothered by something, take action,” says Shamitz.

6. Instill business acumen.
Even though kids are giving money away or fundraising for a cause, they still have a business to run and expenses to pay. Teach kids the nuts and bolts of running a successful business, so in the end, they have more to give.

How do you teach your nieces and nephews to give? Join the conversation at Facebook...

Photo: stockimages
Published: June 19, 2013
]]> Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:56:00 GMT www.commonsense.org

Common Sense Media is dedicated to improving the lives of kids and families by providing the trustworthy information, education, and independent voice they need to thrive in a world of media and technology. We exist because our kids are growing up in a culture that profoundly impacts their physical, social, and emotional well-being. We provide families with the advice and media reviews they need in order to make the best choices for their children. Through our education programs and policy efforts, Common Sense Media empowers parents, educators, and young people to become knowledgeable and responsible digital citizens. For more information, go to: www.commonsense.org.

Whale spotting, dragon slaying, and an alien invasion should perk up lazy sunny days.

Finding the right book for your niece or nephew can be a challenge. But if you guess right and keep new ones coming, you may be on your way to helping raise a lifelong reader.

Check out our Essential Books for Kids and Teens guide to find more than 150 of our perennial favorites. Plus, every month, we highlight a few books for different ages—some exceptional titles that could be the perfect thing to perk your niece’s or nephew’s interest, get your little reader hooked on a new author, or rediscover an old favorite.

Here are our picks for June:

For kids 4 to 7
There’s If You Want to See a Whale by Julie Fogliano and illustrated by Erin E. Stead—the team that created last year’s New York Times Bestseller And Then It’s Spring. The two books have a similar pastel palette, a soft, lyrical tone, and lots of waiting. In the duo’s first book, a little boy and his dog waited for the seeds he planted to grow. Here, a different boy and dog wait to spot a whale as the text warns of distractions on the horizon—birds, boats, clouds, flags—and sweet-smelling roses and a bug nearby. Patience is rewarded in this quiet adventure that celebrates imagination and observation.

For readers 8 to 12
Check out Handbook for Dragon Slayers by Merrie Haskell, an exciting, fast-moving tale set in medieval Germany, with dragons, magical horses, brave teens, and a 13-year-old princess who’s running from an evil knight who wants to kill her. The thrilling plot, appealing characters—including strong female protagonists—and engaging presentation of the Middle Ages will make many young readers want to learn more about the period’s history and legends.

For teens 13 to 17
The book everyone’s talking about is Rick Yancey’s The 5th Wave, an emotionally intense science-fiction adventure set in the aftermath of an alien invasion of Earth that has killed billions. All that keeps protagonist Cassie Connors going is her promise to her younger brother, and she’ll do almost anything to be reunited with him. After she’s grievously wounded, she’s nursed back to health by a mysterious stranger who seems to be keeping secrets from her. Readers will find echoes of The Hunger Games and Ender’s Game, but The 5th Wave displays plenty of originality. It’s a nail-biter from beginning to end!

For more suggestions, check out our “top picks” lists, including Books Like The Hunger Games and our 50-title list of Summer Reading for Kids.

Photo: Courtesy of Common Sense Media
Published: June 19, 2013
]]> Wed, 19 Jun 2013 13:25:00 GMT Up and coming designer Wendy Garfield, owner of La Strada–Meuble, Objet, Décor, started her business just a few years ago and is already getting noticed. She and her business have been featured in many notable lifestyle publications, including: The Boulevard, LI Newsday, House Magazine, and many more. In November 2010, Wendy won the Diamond LIBI award for Interior Design, placing her among the country’s top building professionals. Fun facts: this multi-talented designer is also a professional opera singer and a proud Auntie by Relation to five nieces and nephews.
 
Construction Safety

With the rebuilding going on since the devastating natural disasters in the U.S. this past year, now is a good time to talk about safety during a renovation project if your nieces and nephews are nearby or, as in a few cases, live with you. If you are only renovating a single room, you can usually live in your home during construction. Rooms can be sectioned off with plastic so that the dust doesn’t get all over the place. But it is difficult to do this if more of your living space is being overhauled. Sometimes you can phase the project, so that you are only working on one room at a time. This will take more time, and it may cost you more in the long run. However, it is worth thinking about it if your family is not keen on the idea of relocating for months. Your nieces and nephews will feel more comfortable at home. Just be sure to keep these safety tips in mind…
 
Dust

Dust is inevitable. Even though the rooms under construction will be sealed off, the dust will still find its way in. Be prepared for this. You may find yourself cleaning the same areas again and again. However, a good contractor will know what to do to minimize the amount of dust getting into the rest of the house. Most of the disruption will occur during demolition. At this time, try to find somewhere else to stay for a few days – especially if you have young nieces and nephews with asthma or allergies. After that, get a portable air filter and keep it on high. Make sure to follow the instructions about cleaning and/or replacing the filter. Seal all doorways on both sides, and designate one doorway for workers to enter and exit the home. Carpenters should cut outside whenever possible.
 
Equipment

Workers eager to get home at the end of the day sometimes forget to safeguard the equipment. You need to be prudent. Make sure the workers check every day that all safety locks are in place, batteries are disconnected, and equipment is unplugged. Your little nieces and nephews are curious, so be sure to remind them not to go near the cool looking but dangerous machines. Get them their own toy tools – they will be proud to take part in the renovation!
 
Paint

No need to worry about paints anymore, as today there are eco-friendly products that have something called “low VOCs.” VOCs or Volatile Organic Compounds are considered harmful environmental chemicals. Although the low-VOC products are more expensive, they are well worth the price.

I love using the Benjamin Moore Aura paints. The color is so rich and beautiful and because they include a primer, you will save on labor costs by only having to use two coats of paint instead of three. Bring nieces and nephews with you to your local hardware store to help pick out the colors. All Benjamin Moore colors are available in Aura and the Affinity colors are only available in Aura…and in case you were wondering about the Affinity colors, they are not available in the standard Benjamin Moore product. Do not believe anyone who tells you otherwise. The color will come out different!
 
Renovations are always an inconvenient disruption, but when all is done, you will be so happy in your beautiful new space… I promise!

Photo: supakitmod
Published: June 19, 2013
]]> Wed, 19 Jun 2013 05:03:00 GMT Janice Marie Simon is a Certified Professional Organizer® and a member of the National Association of Professional Organizers and the National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization. Visit her blog at www.theclutterprincess.com.

Remember when apps used to mean appetizers? In today’s modern life, apps are essential for Savvy Aunties–and everyone else.

Several popular apps have added new and improved features to keep you on your toes.

1. Dropbox

Dropbox has ventured more into photo management. They’ve made it easier for you to upload your precious photos from your iPad and iPhone, so you can store them in the cloud. With your photos safely stored somewhere else, you can clear off space on your phone for more photos.

With their new photo album program, you can see all of the photos you have stashed in Dropbox, no matter how many different folders they’re in. Your photos are organized by date, and you can create albums and share them on Facebook, Twitter, or via email.

Some other improvements:

-To make it easier to attach documents in emails, Dropbox is now built into your Yahoo account.
-It’s much simpler to accept shared folder requests on your devices or computer.

Why the Buzz?
When people lose their phones, the first thing they lament is losing any photos they had, and no Savvy Auntie wants to lose any precious photos of our darling nieces and nephews.

2. Evernote

It’s no surprise Evernote 5 was named the 2013 Apple Design Award winner. Evernote continues to garner popularity and loyalty. Personally, I love Evernote, and it’s an essential tool for me. I think of it as digital sticky notes for my brain.

Capture any idea, photo, quote, article, and link, and put it on Evernote. As a cloud-based app, access your information on your smartphone, tablet, and computer. By tagging your notes, you can quickly search for them, and you can organize them into topical notebooks.

Now Evernote has reminders. Add reminders to your notes that are time-related. It’s a great productivity tool and it means you can use Evernote even more for your to-do-list.

Why the Buzz?
Do you really have to ask? I’ve gone back and read this Inc. article a couple of times about CEO Phil Libin.

3. Pinterest

Pinterest has gained so much traction that even eBay changed their website layout to match. More and more companies are creating their own boards to push out ideas to customers. With business boards, you can add your Social Media links, which you can’t do with personal Pinterest boards.

What’s new?
Secret boards were added so you can create a board no one else sees. Gather up gift and craft ideas for the nieces and nephews without them seeing it, or plan your secret vacation.

The Newer Kids on the Block

While some of the popular apps are evolving, some new kids on the block are starting to generate a buzz.

1. Box

Similar to Dropbox, you can store your documents on the cloud, share folders with others, and your information is synced on your smartphone, tablet, computer, and the Internet.

Why the Buzz?
Hospitals prefer Box since it is deemed safer for Patient-Health Information (PHI) and complies with HIPPA regulations because of their encryption policies. With Dropbox, you need to have access to Microsoft Word or PowerPoint if you want to edit a file. With Box, Word add-ins allow you to edit documents without having particular software on your devices.

2. Instaframe

Related to its cousin, Instagram, Instaframe lets you frame your photos, add captions, and post them to Instagram (of course!), Facebook, Twitter, and Flickr. You can also email them to your friends and family.

Why the Buzz?
Instagram remains a very popular app, especially with the Millennials, and with Instaframe, there are even more options to use with your photos.

Photo: anankkml
Published: June 19, 2013
]]> Wed, 19 Jun 2013 04:48:00 GMT Yolanda Shoshana “Shoshi” is a courtesan coachTM, seduction alchemist, and clairvoyant. She is also a popular expert on radio and television shows for seduction, love, sex, aphrodisiacs, and relationships. She is the creatrix of Courtesan Candy, an aphrodisiac perfume line and host of the radio show by the same name on WomensRadio.com.

Come closer, Savvy and Single Aunties, we have something serious to discuss. You say you are ready for love, but your heart may be sending out other messages. There may be things blocking the way into your heart, so it’s time to check your baggage at the door so that you reboot your “heart chakra” to manifest the love that you deserve.

When we are ready to find the one, it would be great if that person would just simply show up. Once we proclaim that we are ready to settle down, we picture all the love that we have to give. We think about family, especially our cute nephews or nieces that we want to introduce to a special someone. Sometimes it is that easy while other times the love of our lives gets delayed in traffic.

When someone does show up, we have to remember that everybody has baggage; there is no way of getting around it. When we are looking for the love of our lives, it would do us all good to remember that there are people who have left a mark on the heart for better or worse. However some people bring us so much drama and heartache that we are left with enough baggage to  fill up an entire airport.

The good news is that you are in control of your feelings and can get your heart ready for the love that you seek anytime you want. When you face all of those things that cause you fear or have caused you pain, you are rebooting your heart chakra.

When the heart chakra is not allowed to heal, that is when you end up in those relationships that are nowhere near what your heart desires in a partner. It is also easier to keep picking the same type of partner that we know is not good for us.

Energy plays a big part on what and who we are attracting into our lives. Our hearts tend to take a beating without us even realizing it. This affects our relationships because we are holding onto the pain, the past, and expectations. Maybe you thought you would have found the one by now or you would have a little one of your own. Instead, maybe you are still in the dating zone or the only child in your life is a niece or nephew. Your life may not look exactly the way thought it would look, it may just be in a different package. That does not mean it has less value.

Our heart chakras have to be rebooted every once in awhile. Dig deeper to ask questions from the heart,  to check in with how you are feeling about your life. Above all else, take time to show yourself some love. Take a good look at what you have versus what you lack.

Photo: Sira Anamwong
Published: June 19, 2013
]]> Wed, 19 Jun 2013 04:38:00 GMT Mad Men, the television drama set in the 1960s now in its sixth season on AMC, then you know that the costume design plays an integral role in each episode. Like every carefully researched and designed historic detail that Mad Men creator and executive producer Matthew Weiner is known for, the Mad Men costumes authentically represent the era, the Zeitgeist, the characters, and the stories Weiner tells.

In an exclusive interview with Savvy Auntie, Janie Bryant, the Emmy® award-winning and Costume Designers Guild award-winning costume designer for Mad Men, reveals how her three aunts (among other family members) have helped inspire her career since she was a little girl growing up in the South. Janie is also a fashion designer, brand ambassador, author, and, notably to us, a proud Savvy Auntie of two nieces and two nephews.

It was Janie’s namesake, her great-aunt Kate - Janie’s full name is Katherine Jane Bryant - who inspired her very first fashion drawings. “As a child, I was always drawing and finger-painting, Janie says. “And after church and the country club on Sunday afternoons, my family would visit my Great-Aunt Kate and Great-Uncle Hallman at their home. I would sit on the sofa with Great-Aunt Kate and just draw with her for hours and hours, just the two of us.” It was at that time, as just age 5, that Janie drew her first female forms, adding fashion designs to the forms.

It wasn’t just the special “QualAuntie Time” that her great-aunt Kate, a flaming red-head, spent with her drawing that inspired Janie. Great-Aunt Kate would let Janie go through her amazing stocking boxes which Janie found inspiring; Great-Aunt Kate always wore foundation garments, in that old-fashioned sort of way that her husband insisted on. And Janie remembers being inspired by her great-aunt’s perfume bottles of which she had so many.  And Great-Aunt Kate gave Janie her dinner ring, which Janie has worn it ever since.  “It was a pretty special time,” Janie recalls.

Janie’s other namesake is her father’s sister, Janie’s Aunt Jane. “Aunt Jane has always been one of my favorite aunts,” Janie explains.  Aunt Jane lives in Mississippi and when the cousins would get together, Aunt Jane would always lead them in the name game and other fun activities. Janie says that her Aunt Jane is one of the funniest people she knows.



Janie Bryant with her Aunt Jane


And then there is Aunt Linda, Janie’s aunt by marriage, whom Janie describes as an “incredible Southern lady” and successful historical romance novelist under the name Lindsey Hanks. At one time, Aunt Linda had a women’s fashion boutique and when she closed the store, she offered Janie some of the vintage pieces she thought she’d like. Aunt Linda also shares lots of family photographs from the Mad Men era that Janie uses for inspiration for her costume design.

But one of her Aunt Linda’s most prescient gifts to Janie was the 1967 wedding gown she wore when she married Janie’s Uncle Billy. Linda offered it to Janie during the hiatus between seasons 5 and 6 of Mad Men. And while Janie had no idea that there would be a wedding scene in the premier episode of season 6, lo-and behold, when she read the script, there was a wedding scene. “I showed Matt the photo of my aunt’s wedding gown and it made it into the episode. It meant so much to me that it was Aunt Linda’s,” Janie recalls.

Janie is not only a proud niece, but also a proud aunt of two nieces and two nephews: Amelia, age 15, Penelope Jane, age 10, Ian Porter, age 7, and Bolen age 4. Janie started a tradition with Amelia that when her nieces and nephews each turn 8, Aunt Janie invites them out to spend solo time with her and her husband in California. It’s their “rite of passage,” she explains. Janie is expecting Amelia and Penelope Jane for a special visit this July.


Janie Bryant with niece Amelia 2003


“I’m not their parent, but I’m still their family, so I have different influence over them,” Janie says of her relationship with her nieces and nephews. The girls, who are older, understand that Janie works in fashion and costume design for the film business. Janie’s niece Amelia got first-hand experience watching Aunt Janie at work, spending a week with on the Mad Men set and meeting the cast during her visit to L.A. at age nine. The girls are proud of their aunt, and showed it when Aunt Janie became a brand ambassador for Maidenform, the undergarment brand featured in the first season of Mad Men, and when her book, The Fashion File (Grand Central Life & Style) was published in 2010.



Janie Bryant with niece Penelope Jane at a Dodgers game

And earlier this year, when Janie was being inducted into the Brenau Alumni Hall of Fame, but could not attend (Janie’s mother Dottie was there to accept the award on her behalf), her influence still ran deep. Amelia was in the audience with her mom, Janie’s sister Laura, and her sister, Penelope Jane and she later revealed that she was so inspired by the experience that she will apply to the university’s early college program. This really touched Janie.



Janie Bryant with niece Penelope Jane at Disney World

I wondered if Janie’s Savvy Auntie-ness inspired her costume design for Megan (née Calvet) played by Jessica Paré. (In a fourth season episode entitled The Beautiful Girls, when Megan is assistant to Don Draper’s (Jon Hamm), she tells Don that she’s good with children because she has “four nieces and six nephews.” This was one of the reasons we think Don chooses to marry Megan over then girlfriend, Dr. Faye Miller, who admits she’s not great with kids. While Janie says that she does not design costumes for Megan that reflect her role as an aunt, in seasons 5 and 6, the new Mrs. Megan Draper and the former Mrs. Betty Draper, now Mrs. Betty Francis, are each costume designed very differently.


Janie's husband, Peter Yozell, Janie and her niece, Amelia


“Before she marries Don,” Janie says, “Megan was the fresh new flower in Don’s life. She was sweet and very young. And now she’s in bolder colors like corals and reds, gold and other metallics, and black, which is very modern and chic. She’s a little European, modern and chic herself, and her costumes reflect that.”

And Betty’s palette is all about cool tones, the opposite of Megan. “I use pale yellows, blues, grays, white, ivory and beige. It’s all about her looking cool and icy,” Janie says. “Betty is all about perfection, always looking perfect. Everything is permanently pressed in every moment of her life. Her costumes represent a façade of perfection, now even more so that she’s a political wife.”

And back to aunthood, Janie says: “I have such love for my aunts. And being an aunt myself, I am always looking for whatever I can do to be there for my nieces and nephews and help them with anything that they need or want.


Penelope Jane with her Aunt Janie

“I hope Amelia will intern with me one day,” Janie says. In the meantime, on their visits, she and her nieces go shopping and do “girlie girl” things together. “It’s always my favorite day,” Janie says.

“I am a lucky girl,” Janie adds.

And we believe your nieces and nephews are very lucky to have you as their aunt, Janie

###

To Note:

Fashion editors and bloggers publish their interpretations of the costumes on Mad Men, and their thematic significance, almost as often as entertainment and television editors and bloggers review the episodes. (My favorite is Mad Men fashion reviewers are Tom and Lorenzo, the couple behind TomandLorenzo.com)

Janie Bryant was nominated for a Costume Designers Guild Award for “Outstanding Costume Design for Television Series–Period/Fantasy” in 2005, 2006, and 2007. She was nominated for Emmy® awards in 2004, 2005, and 2007 for “Outstanding Costumes for a Series,” taking home the Emmy in 2005 for her work for Deadwood. She was nominated again for an Emmy for her work on “Mad Men” in 2009, 2010 and 2011. The Costume Designers Guild honored Janie with three consecutive nominations for “Outstanding Costume Design for Television Series – Period/Fantasy,” for her work on “Mad Men.” She won in 2009 and 2010.

Janie’s costumes for Mad Men inspired fashion lines at Banana Republic®, where she has collaborated with Simon Kneen on three seasons of a Banana Republic/Mad Men Collection.


Photos of Janie Bryant, Amelie and Penelope Jane are courtesy Janie Bryant.
Photo of Mad Men characters Betty Francis and Megan Draper are via AMC

Published: June 12, 2013
]]> Wed, 12 Jun 2013 14:44:00 GMT Sheree Winslow is a leader and a writer and founder of WomenAtTheTables.com. As someone who has managed company operations and more than 1200 employees, she is passionate about helping women advance as leaders. She started Women At The Tables as a way to inspire and mentor women and girls who want to lead. You can connect with Sheree via email sheree@womenatthetables.com, through the Women At The Tables Facebook page or at WomenAtTheTables.com.
 
The basketball leaves the player’s fingertips and moves toward the hoop. The arch seems right and the crowd moves forward in their seats waiting for it to drop. But before it snaps the net, the ball hits the back of the rim, takes a bounce to the right, and falls to the floor. No basket. No score. The collective fans issue an audible sigh.
 
The player tries again with the same result. She shoots from another spot on the court, but once more, she misses. Even for the best shooters, there are nights when their shots go cold. To compensate, a player may focus on her rebounding and defense. Or she may work to assist by passing the ball off to teammates. But for some players who are well developed at shooting, an off night is going to impact the team’s performance.

Passing On My Father’s Advice
 
As Father’s Day approaches, I have been thinking of the fatherly advice I have received over the years that I could pass on. And the one thing my father said that most often gets played in my mind is a coaching tip he gave me after a basketball game in which I had trouble scoring: “If your shot is off, shoot until you’re on again.”
 
That was the kind of thinking and determination that turned my father into an all-American basketball player when he was in high school. For him, basketball wasn’t just a game. At some point when he was still in elementary school he determined that he was going to become good enough to earn a college scholarship. My father was one of six in a family where no one had graduated from college, and by the age of 11, he had already determined a degree was something he wanted and sports was the way to finance an education.
 
So he practiced his shooting skills. While growing up in a small town in Montana, my father would often shovel snow off the public outdoor courts in order to practice. Even the harsh effects of weather would not deter him from working toward his goal. And by the time he was in high school, he had turned into the kind of player that lead his team to win a state championship title. He was offered full ride scholarships at several schools.
 
Just like all players, my dad had good games and bad games. There were days when he made most of his shots and days when he struggled. But as someone who was banking on basketball as his ticket to school, he only saw one option when his shot went cold—keep shooting.   
 
When My Shot Was Off

Last year I felt like I was in the middle of a bad game. I was missing a lot of the shots I was taking in my career and personal life. Again and again, I found myself making attempts that didn’t provide the satisfaction of a sunken basket. In each case I was using the experience and skills that had worked for me previously but I wasn’t reaching the same level of past success.
 
In self-help author Karen Salmansohn’s book, Bounce Back, she calls a period of time when things just don’t seem to be going right “the vortex.” Most of us will experience this feeling at some point—the feeling that we have stepped into an alternate universe where everything is going wrong.
 
And that’s when we’re faced with a decision that my father might put in the following terms: we can either quit playing or keep shooting.
 
So no matter how bad or frustrating things became for me last year, I just kept shooting. And pretty soon, I was putting points on the board again with positive hits in all areas of my life.    
 
When They Should Keep Shooting for Their Goals

While my father’s advice can be used as we encounter unexpected challenges in our own lives, we can also use the “keep shooting” philosophy to help our nieces and nephews in our role as Aunties. Though related to basketball, this idea of determination can provide inspiration when nieces and nephews experience difficult times and make attempts but fail physically, mentally, or socially.
 
1. Physically.
Whether it’s dance or sports or fitness, kids will be faced with times when they physically struggle to achieve. During those times, it’s good to think about Michael Jordan, who used failure to fuel the work that eventually made him legendary. For inspiration, you can show them the Michael Jordan and Nike commercial in which he states “maybe I led you to believe that it was easy when it wasn’t.” Physical success requires a mindset of determination whether the goal is personal best or a high level of success.

2. Mentally.
Naturally, some subjects are easier than others. Some concepts and abstractions are more easily understood and absorbed. Putting aside situations in which a learning disorder is involved, there will be times when schoolwork becomes more challenging. During those times our nieces and nephews may find they need to put in additional hours with their homework, seek help or tutoring, and find additional resources to master their studies.

3. Socially.
Riding the social ups and downs that kids usually face is not easy. And whether it’s with their friends or their first romantic interests, nieces and nephews will likely encounter social rejection at some point. They may not know yet that not everyone we encounter will like us, no matter how we try to gain their interest or approval. As Aunties, we can help them understand that sometimes they need to keep looking for the friends with which they will form a natural bond.

Photo: hin255
Published: June 12, 2013
]]> Wed, 12 Jun 2013 07:06:00 GMT www.aota.org

Founded in 1917, the American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA) represents the professional interests and concerns of more than 140,000 occupational therapists, assistants, and students nationwide. The Association educates the public and advances the profession of occupational therapy by providing resources, setting standards including accreditations, and serving as an advocate to improve health care. Based in Bethesda, Md., AOTA’s major programs and activities are directed toward promoting the professional development of its members and assuring consumer access to quality services so patients can maximize their individual potential. For more information, go to www.aota.org.

Advice for families to influence a lifetime of healthy decisions

While obesity is a concern at any age, eating and leisure habits developed as early as Pre-K are often precursors to lifelong patterns. The family is a key contributor in promoting physical and mental wellness to prevent obesity through healthy routines.

Obesity can affect children’s self-esteem and participation in daily activities. Children who are overweight are more susceptible to bullying, anxiety, and isolation; can have difficulty choosing healthy meals; and could face a lifetime of challenges with healthy sleep patterns.

The American Occupational Therapy Association offers the following tips for establishing and maintaining healthy habits that will last a lifetime:

1. Increase physical activity.
Reduce screen time (computer and TV) and encourage more physical activity including recreational sports. Join a dance or yoga class with your nieces and nephews to get in more qualAuntie time! Encourage them to go for walks or ride their bikes in the afternoons now that they’re out of school. When you’re out together, look for opportunities to take the stairs instead of the elevator or escalator.

2. Make activity a family routine.
Activities as a family not only promote physical fitness but strengthen emotional bonds. Can you replace an hour of TV time at the end of the day with a walk, hike, or game of basketball? Play Wii games that involve movement like tennis or even snowboarding. Play in teams and hold tournaments if you have many nieces and nephews, and get their parents in on the fun!

3. Make family mealtime a priority.
Organized meals are an opportunity to gather as a family. If your nieces and nephews are spending the night or staying with their favorite Auntie for the weekend, cook together to remind them of what they are putting into their bodies. To incorporate a lesson on where food comes from, plant a summer garden and enjoy its vegetables and herbs. Share your favorite healthy food with your niece or nephew so they have a variety to choose from.

4. Make healthy lifestyle choices.
Set aside time every week to eat a healthy breakfast or brunch, or have a nutritious picnic with the kids on the weekends. Talk to your nieces and nephews to make sure that they have a good balance of both sedentary and physical activities. Substitute stickers, hugs, and praise as rewards, rather than food whenever they make healthy choices.

5. Build community awareness.
Involve their parents and find out ways to build safe playgrounds in your community. In order to promote physical fitness and mental well-being, occupational therapy practitioners use everyday activities to help children and youth participate in the things they want and need to do. Help your nieces and nephews find fun and safe volunteer opportunities or local clubs that encourage healthy lifestyles.

“We know that obesity presents challenges for both physical and mental health. As activity experts, occupational therapy practitioners recommend the ‘just right fit’ to reduce stress, increase socialization, and increase physical activity and leisure,” says AOTA’s Pediatric Coordinator Sandy Schefkind, MS, OTR/L.

Click here to view or download the American Occupational Therapy Association’s tip sheet on childhood obesity.

Photo: photostock
Published: June 12, 2013
]]> Wed, 12 Jun 2013 06:56:00 GMT Andy Robertson runs Family Gamer TV and his Family Gaming website.

At an LA videogame event showcasing new and upcoming videogames, our Auntie gaming expert had hands on time with the new Xbox One console that offers a great way to combine TV viewing and gaming in one box.

He also tracked down some breaking news on those ever popular Skylanders Swap Force this time.

These new characters extend the game and offer new ways for Savvy Aunties, nephews and nieces to play together.

Star Strike



Stealth Elf Series 3



Rollerbrawl



Wash Buckler



Night Shift



Stink Bomb



Rattle Shake



Freeze Blade



Free Ranger



Follow his E3 coverage here.

Photos: Courtesy of Andy Robertson
Published: June 12, 2013
]]> Wed, 12 Jun 2013 06:41:00 GMT Dr. Leigh Vinocur is a board certified emergency physician and national spokesperson for the American College of Emergency Physicians. Currently she is serving on faculty as an Adjunct Assistant Professor, at Louisiana State University Health Science Center, School of Medicine in Shreveport, Louisiana. For more on Dr. Vinocur visit www.drleigh.com.

When outside playing or gardening with nieces and nephews this summer, watch out for poisonous plants!

Poison Ivy, Oak, and Sumac

Poison ivy and poison oak plants have their leaves in groups of three. Poison sumac has more than three leaves and can be distinguished from regular sumac by the berries – green and white berries are from the poison sumac as opposed to red berries on the regular sumac.

Poison ivy is found in the eastern US while poison oak and poison sumac are found in the southeastern states.

All these plants produce an irritating resin called urushiol; when it contacts the skin, it causes an allergic dermatitis. Only half of the population is sensitive to it, however about 10-15 percent are highly allergic.

Rash usually starts 1-2 days after exposure with red itchy bumps, which then form fluid-filled blisters that can continue to appear weeks later. Very serious, life-threatening reactions can occur if the plants are ingested or if they are inhaled when burned.

It is a myth that the rash and blisters are contagious. By the time the rash appears, all the toxic urushiol has been absorbed into the skin. This occurs usually within minutes of contact. However the oil from the plant can stay on your clothes, garden tools, and pets. It is the contact with those things that causes spreading to different body parts or other people – sometimes even months later! In fact, the oil can be active on any surface, including dead plants, for five years!

Savvy Itch Prevention Tips

1. Keep in mind that most rashes do resolve without treatment.

2. Remember not to scratch a rash because it can cause a secondary infection.

3. Try to wear long pants and long sleeves when outside if you or your nieces and nephews are very sensitive.

4. Over the counter diphenhydramine, steroid creams, cool oatmeal baths, as well as calamine lotions can help with the symptoms of itching.

5. Severely allergic people may need oral or intravenous steroids for bad outbreaks.

6. Some people say that spraying your skin and clothes with antiperspirant containing aluminum chlorohydrate may help prevent urushiol from irritating your skin.

This summer, Aunties, be plant savvy and remember the rhyme “Leaves of three, leave them be!”

Photo: Danilo Rizzuti
Published: June 12, 2013
]]> Wed, 12 Jun 2013 06:30:00 GMT
Joe Jurek is the self-published author of the new children’s book, The Don’t Make Books About Uncles. He’s a copywriter in the Chicagoland area, and an uncle...obviously.

“They don’t make stuff about uncles.” This is a realization every uncle in the history of mankind has come to—and a realization had by any aunt who has ever done any shopping on behalf of an uncle.

It is a fact. The sky is blue. Ice is cold. And when you go to Target looking to buy something with the word “UNCLE” on it, they don’t have it. Do they have the “My Auntie Loves Me” onesie? Oh, yeah, they have that. They have two different kinds of those probably.

It’s like they’re taunting us. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.

I personally experienced this injustice after my brother called me and gave me the big news: “You’re going to be an uncle, Joe.” After the news sunk in, the first thing I could think to do was go to the bookstore. I wanted to buy an uncle book for this new little person who would be coming into the world in nine months.

SPOILER ALERT: There were no uncle books. Not in the big bookstores. Not in the little bookstores. Not in online bookstores. Not even in libraries. At least not any books suitable for children. Don’t get me wrong, Uncle Tom’s Cabin is an amazing novel...just not before bedtime.

So I took it upon myself to stand up for uncles everywhere. I self-published They Don’t Make Books About Uncles—the story of an uncle who takes his niece and nephew to the bookstore only to discover there are no uncle books. (Sound familiar?) He takes them on a journey inside their favorite stories, where they soon learn that anything they can imagine, their uncle will do for them.

Still... They don’t make other stuff about uncles. This book is one small step. What about the onesies, the bibs, the shirts, the socks, the pillows, the made-for-television specials? Where’s the giant leap for uncle-kind?

We can hope that articles like this reach the eyes of some children’s merchandise manufacturer, and that we soon see uncle onesies in their rightful place next to aunt onesies at your favorite big-box store. In the meantime, your best bet for finding uncle gear is online. T-shirt websites like www.cafepress.com, www.psychobabyonline.com, www.zazzle.com, etc. seem to be the only places that give you options. You can choose from the uncle stuff these sites have in stock or create your own personalized stuff, like I did here with original artwork from my book: http://www.cafepress.com/dd/73779526.

And don’t even get me started about national days. We have Mother’s Day, of course. Father’s Day? Goes without saying. July 28 is Auntie’s Day(R). And Uncle’s Day is...

Wait for it...

Yeah, that’s right. There is no Uncle’s Day. (Single tear.) I just don’t get it! Is it something we said? Do we have bad breath? Are we close-talkers?

There has to be some reason they’re not making stuff about us. But until we figure out what that reason is, we uncles will have to keep soldiering on... Being awesome... Buying things for our nieces and nephews out of the goodness of our hearts... Making the world a better place.

You can buy his book here, or at any major online bookstore. And you can like this page if you think there should be an Uncle’s Day, https://www.facebook.com/UnclesDay. Follow Uncle Joe on Twitter @TDMBAUncles or here, https://www.facebook.com/theydontmakebooksaboutuncles.

Photo: imagerymajestic
Published: June 12, 2013
]]> Wed, 12 Jun 2013 06:04:00 GMT
Growing up in America's Heartland, Shawn Blackhawk used her poetry from an early age to express herself. Her philosophy has always been: "I'll try anything once." She uses her words like a brush, painting vivid pictures, evoking as much emotion from her readers as she can. She appreciates struggles, as they pave the road to triumph, and firmly believes that the darkest parts of the human mind and soul are the only way to eventually celebrate the light. She has been recognized for Illuminating Digital Publishing Excellence by Jenkins Group (eLit Awards) and was the 2011 Silver Medal Finalist for the Electronically Published Internet Collation (EPIC Awards). Shawn's poetry book can be purchased at L-Book.com.

It’s June. And for the LGBTQ community, this means Pride Month. It’s hard to narrow down one thing that makes this month special for me.

What is the one thing that makes me PROUD to be the lesbiAunt I am?

Is it that gay marriage is legal in 12 states now?
One of which is Maryland, the state I live in. The state where I stood in front of church, surrounded by friends and family, and married the woman of my dreams. Yes, I’m proud of that.

Is it the fight that has been going on for years for equality?
Stonewall in 1969, the first Gay Pride parade in 1970, the assassination of Harvey Milk, the AIDS crisis of the 1980’s, Don’t Ask Don’t Tell (DADT) in the 1990’s, DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) in 1996, Ellen coming out in 1997, Matthew Shephard’s death in 1998, 2000 saw the boycotting of gay young men and leaders of the Boy Scouts, and on and on. There are so many, it’s hard to choose just one.

But after much thought and consideration, I finally decided on the topic of Pride that means the most to me – the one that most young gays and lesbians have no clue about, and which straight people have most likely never heard. It’s the story of our symbol – the symbol that above all else says “GAY” in a big pink way. Yes, I’m talking about the Pink Triangle.

The Pink Triangle

This story actually starts way back in 1933. This was the year that the Nazi’s began rounding up the people that didn’t fit their ideal of who was worthy of freedom, and in some cases, life. Each “type” of person rounded up by the Nazi’s were given a colored symbol that allowed officers to know with whom they were interacting, and help other prisoners find their own “kind.” There was the yellow Star of David, which most people knew meant “Jewish.” Red Triangles meant “Liberal.” Green Triangles were for lifelong “Felons.” The Purple Triangle was for “Jehovah’s Witnesses.” The “Black Triangle” stood for many things: Roma-s, alcoholics, vagrants, pacifists,  resisters, prostitutes, anarchists and drug addicts. The “Brown Triangle” was for gypsies. The “Pink Triangle” (an upside-down triangle) was for homosexuals.

Now, there were many variations on these badges. There were doubles, two colors, uninverted, etc. The Nazi’s were very interested in making sure everyone who was different was well known, singled out, shamed and easily identified as targets for cruelty.

Now, the “Pink Triangle” has been made into a symbol of Pride – a symbol that we, as a group once designated as degenerates, can claim and use to assert with full confidence that we are human and just like everyone else.

Inversion of the Triangle

What I have a hard time with, is the inversion of the triangle. Yes, we survived. Yes, we are a strong group, working hard in each and every state to win the equality we deserve as Americans. We have come a long way, fought hard, and will continue to do so. But it bothers me that along the way, we decided to reverse the Triangle.

I know that the symbol carries so many horrid memories of a time many would like to forget. Yet, I wish our community had chosen to OWN the triangle and all the memories, connotations and racial bigotry that still comes with wearing one – to use it not only as a sign of pride, but as a symbol of a people who refuse to bow to the hatred of others. I’m sad that the younger generation – our own nieces and nephews – and some heterosexuals, don’t even know what it is, or where it came from. They think it’s something that we made up to identify ourselves, to draw attention to the homosexual community.

So while I’ll respect those who choose to use the Pink Triangle right-side-up as their way of identifying who they are, I’ll pass – with the rather large, very pink triangle tattoo on my neck, upside down. It shows that I choose willingly to draw attention not only to my sexuality, but to the triumph our community has risen to through the years.

Marching With My Nephews

This June, I’ll march with Pride. It will be the first Pride I’ve taken my nephews to. I think this is the first year they are old enough to understand that it’s important. They may not know all the story, but someday, I’ll tell them. They’ll know where my people have been and where we are heading. But this year I’ll have a little help with the marching and the bearing of the weight of those who fought hard for us to get to this point upon my shoulders. Or should I say neck? Happy Pride month, everyone!

Published: June 7, 2013
]]> Fri, 07 Jun 2013 17:55:00 GMT Alexis Wolfer is a well-known beauty and lifestyle expert and the founder of The Beauty Bean, an online magazine that promotes Real Beauty. She is also the creator of the international and viral Makeup Free Mondays movement and can be found tweeting about all things real and realistic beauty at @AlexisWolfer.

In a throwback to tie-dyed t-shirts and 80s-style spin-art, DIY nail art takes a polish from proper to psychedelic without any artistic talent with – get this – the help of a glass of water! Here’s a fun way to start the summer with your favorite nieces!

After prepping your nieces’ nails for polish and applying a base coat, let the nails fully dry. Once the base coat is dry, fill a few plastic cups with water (high enough so that they can easily dip their fingers into the water, or about an inch or two from the top).

Carefully, using the nail polish brush, drip the nail polish colors of your choice into the water. (I used L’Oreal Colour Riche Nail Polish in Tweet Me, $5.99, and ButterLONDON in Primrose Hill Picnic, $14.)

Experiment with dropping colors adjacent to one another as well as onto each other. Use an orange stick – or just the tip of a pencil! – to swirl colors into a desired pattern. How they appear in the water is exactly how they’ll appear on your nieces’ nails.

Have your nieces carefully roll their nails onto the surface of the water, depositing the color onto the nails. (A lot of nail polish will end up on your cuticle, and even on the pads of your nieces’ fingers, but don’t worry about it.)

Add more nail polish as needed, rolling one finger into the polish at a time until all the nails are covered – and likely messy.

Once dry, use q-tips will nail polish remover to clean around the cuticles (or, in my case, my whole hand, which, by the end, was covered in nail polish).

Know that the nail polish will take longer than usual to dry because of the water, but, on the bright side, the smudges won’t show very much because of the pattern.

Finish with a top coat and enjoy!

For more fun DIY nail art projects and tips, check out the links below!

-How To DIY Ombré Manicure!
-Love Glitter Nail Polish? Here’s How To Remove It Easily!
-How To DIY Animal Print Nail Art Easily!

Photo: Courtesy of Alexis Wolfer
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 15:01:00 GMT www.mentaltoughnesstrainer.com

Wendy Lynne is the Director of Mental Toughness Academy. The Academy’s online Mental Toughness Training helps kids build confidence, focus, determination and the ability to bounce back from adversity – what we call Mental Toughness. Her passion is helping kids, their parents and coaches transform their thinking so they lead happier, healthier and more successful lives. Go here to get a free ebook “The 10 Commandments To Being A Great Sports Parent” and a free training for youth athletes “How To Master the Pressure.”

We regularly hear from youth athletes how devastating their last loss or choke was. It can seem like the end of the world. What young athletes are missing is…

Perspective

This is where you as an aunt can be a huge help.

If you see your niece or nephew having a total meltdown after practice and complaining that their coach hates them and treats them unfairly, ask them, “How do you know this is true?” Then hear them out.

You might hear things like the coach was making them do more pushups than any other person or they have to sit on the bench when everyone on the team knows they are the best player.

Surprise them by saying very calmly, “Wow, that’s so great!”

You will see a puzzled look on their face, because they will not expect your response. They may even get a little peeved.

And then say, “Let me tell you a little story about a farmer…”

There once was a farmer whose only horse broke out of the corral and ran away. The farmer’s neighbors, upon hearing of the runaway horse said to the farmer, "Oh what bad luck!" The farmer just replied, "We’ll see."

About a week later, the horse returned, bringing with it a whole herd of wild horses, which the farmer and his son quickly corralled. The neighbors, hearing of the farmer’s new luck getting a herd of horses said, "Oh what good luck!" The farmer just replied, "We’ll see."

Later that day, the farmer's son's leg was badly broken when he was thrown from one of the wild horses he was trying to break. A few days later the broken leg became infected and the son became delirious with fever. The neighbors, all-hearing of the incident, came to see the son. As they stood there, the neighbors said, "Oh what bad luck!" The farmer replied, "We’ll see."

A war broke out and the country was in need of soldiers. The military sent one of its captains to the village to conscript young men to fight in the war. When the captain came to take the farmer's son he found a young man with a broken leg who was delirious with fever. Knowing there was no way the son could fight, the captain left him there. A few days later, the son's fever broke and a few months later, his leg healed. By then the war had ended and the son guided the family farm to prosperity.

What the farmer teaches us...

This story beautifully illustrates perspective and how to help your niece or nephew reframe the meaning of anything.

Explain the moral of the story is that you never know how things will turn out. You just have to trust and expect the best. Share examples from your own life of how something you thought was really unfair or tough turned out for the best.

Photo: imagerymajestic
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 14:51:00 GMT Common Sense Media is dedicated to improving the lives of kids and families by providing the trustworthy information, education, and independent voice they need to thrive in a world of media and technology. We exist because our kids are growing up in a culture that profoundly impacts their physical, social, and emotional well-being. We provide families with the advice and media reviews they need in order to make the best choices for their children. Through our education programs and policy efforts, Common Sense Media empowers parents, educators, and young people to become knowledgeable and responsible digital citizens. For more information, go to: www.commonsense.org.

If you know young kids, then you know they can be very hands-on! These titles are focused on visual arts and creating with hands (even creating meals!), just right for learning by doing.

1. Dora’s Cooking Club (Ages 4+)
As kids help Dora and her family put together a series of recipes, they pick up some arithmetic basics – such as numbers and patterns – and get a friendly lesson in cooperation and respect. The game is incredibly well-designed for use by preschoolers and kindergartners.

2. Draw and Tell - by Duck Duck Moose (Ages 4+)
Kids can tell stories and illustrate them with this app, which helps users get started by providing ideas for settings and characters and encourages kids to express themselves with artwork they create within the app. It’s a fun way to introduce young kids to digital storytelling.

3. Crayola Kids (Ages 5+)
As kids color and mix media forms to create art on this vibrant site, they get to see how imagination coupled with nifty online tools can produce unique creations. There’s something for the whole family here, from the youngest scribblers to the most skilled designers.

4. DLTK’s Crafts for Kids (Ages 5+)
In addition to offering fun craft ideas for kids ages 2 and up, this activity-packed educational site introduces young kids to basic concepts, such as ABCs and 123s, holidays, cultures, animals, nutrition, weather, and much more.

5. Faces iMake - Right Brain Creativity (Ages 5+)
This stellar app encourages kids to create art from common objects, and video lessons teach about artistic inspiration and symbolism. The overall design is kid-friendly and fun, and kids can share their creations via email and social media and with other app users worldwide.

6. Crafting Mama (Ages 6+)
In this latest spin-off of the Cooking Mama series, kids can build 40 different craft projects – from pinwheels and clay ocarinas to earrings, bird houses, and even mini-Mama dolls. All these activities are performed using the DS stylus.

7. How to Draw - Full Version (Ages 6+)
Kids get practical steps for drawing specific objects, such as animals or a space shuttle, while learning more about shapes, increasing their drawing vocabulary, and building patience. Clear verbal instructions can help even younger kids learn how to draw.

Faces iMake - Right Brain Creativity can inspire kids to create art with everyday objects found in your home. Let your nieces and nephews go wild!

Photo: stockimages
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 14:40:00 GMT www.InOnAdoption.com

Elisabeth O’Toole is a mother of three children through adoption and a speaker and writer on adoption topics. She is also the author of the book, In On It: What Adoptive Parents Would Like You To Know About Adoption. A Guide for Relatives and Friends (FIG Press, 2011). For more information and to read an excerpt from In On It, please visit www.InOnAdoption.com.
 
One morning several years ago, my mother took my newly-adopted daughter out for a walk through her neighborhood. As they headed down the block, my mother’s neighbor approached them going the other way. As she passed, this neighbor looked down at my daughter, then up at my mother, and asked my mother, “How’d that baby get so brown?”
 
Later that day, my mother shared this experience with me, saying with frustration, “I was speechless. What on earth do you say when people say things like that? How can I respond to those kinds of comments?”
 
My mother’s experience was eye-opening for me. When my husband and I decided to adopt, we knew it was likely we’d sometimes find ourselves on the receiving end of questions and comments about our children and adoption. What we hadn’t realized was that other people, people close to us and to our children, also sometimes find themselves speaking on behalf of adoption and on behalf of our children.
 
If you are an aunt or a close friend of an adoptive family, you, too, may find yourself fielding unexpected adoption questions or comments when picking up your niece or nephew at school or while walking with them through the shopping mall. Here are a few suggestions to help you feel more prepared:
 
-Discuss with the child’s parents the kinds of questions people often ask about adoption (“How much did she cost?” “What is she?” “Is she adopted?” “Why did they adopt?”). Ask them how they’d like you to respond.
 
-A good rule of thumb is to remember that your most important audience is always the child. Frame your words for the child’s ears, not necessarily those of the stranger in the grocery store who’s asking you questions.
 
-Understand the family’s boundaries around privacy – especially that of the child. Remember that much of a child’s personal history is private – not a secret, but private – and the child’s to manage when they’re old enough to do so.
 
-Educate yourself about contemporary adoption. Seek out the adoption experiences of others, including adoptive parents, birth parents, and adult adoptees. Read blogs and books that offer insight and information into some of the particular joys and challenges of adoption.
 
-Act as an ambassador for adoption in your own words and attitude. Use positive adoption language. Share the extended family’s pleasure and gratitude for the child’s adoption.
 
-If you have children yourself, help them feel comfortable and secure about the concept of adoption. Remind them that their cousin is a real and permanent member of the family, no matter how they arrived into it, and that adoption is just another way of forming a family.
 
-Over time, your niece or nephew may themselves come to you with questions or to express some of their feelings around adoption. In fact, it’s not at all unusual for adoptees to worry about hurting their parents’ feelings by discussing their adoption in ways that are not wholly positive. You may be a safe place for them to turn to process these emotions. Be ready to talk to them about adoption, too.

Photo: africa
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 14:29:00 GMT Lisa Kothari is the founder of pepperspollywogs.com.

Now that summer is coming, you may decide to have a water park kids birthday party. Here are some fun ideas for this type of party, where you can bring the water park home and make this a budget-friendly party for your nieces and nephews!

Play Water Balloon Volleyball

You’ll need lots of water balloons, stored in a bucket full of water, and towels for each pair of children. Divide the children into two groups. Pair them off and give each pair a beach towel. One side begins by placing a water balloon in the center of their towel. Each child holds onto two corners of the towel. The object is to toss the water balloon over the net with the opposing side catching the balloon in their towel. The volley continues until one side misses and the balloon breaks, giving the other team a point. First team to 15 points wins!

Variation: If you do not own a volleyball net, put two sets of pairs a distance apart and have them volley back and forth.

Variation for young children: Instead of beach towels, use two large blankets. Divide into teams and each team member holds a part of the blanket. Toss the balloon back and forth between teams. Not too tough with a bit of teamwork!

Make sure to carefully clean up the balloon remains, as they are choke hazards for young children.

Squirt Guns

Give out plastic squirt guns and fill them up, and have the kids run around with them...squirting water at one another... They can also keep the toy as a party favor.

Sprinklers

You can get a fun sprinkler or Slip ‘N Slide that the kids can enjoy together.

Pool Fun

If you have a pool, the kids can definitely swim, but make sure to have an adult supervise the pool. Depending on the kids’ ages, you can play relay swimming races or Marco Polo.

If you don’t have a regular pool, you can buy a small plastic pool, and fill it with bubble solution and water, and have the kids wade in the bubbly water and blow massive bubbles!

Water Park Party Favors

Give out a small goldfish as a favor. They can also serve as a centerpiece for your party table!

You could also buy stuffed fish/ocean animals and put them at the centerpiece of your table. You can buy enough for each of your guests to take one home, or have a raffle.

If you have other kinds of kids party favors, you can hide them in a bucket of sand for the kids to dig out as they depart the party.

Water Park Party Decorations

Use green and blue balloons to decorate. Since this party will be outside, this is a great way to keep the budget under control with minimal decorations.

Water Park Party Food

You can have fun little foods for your guests. Usually a cookout would work really well. You can also have gummy candy in the shape of fish or other water animals as party treats!

A water-themed party will be an absolute blast, especially on a hot day! Make sure if you do plan an outdoors party, such as this one, you have a secondary date reserved for a back-up party in case of rain!

Photo: hyena reality
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 14:08:00 GMT
Hi there, Auntie! Or should I say täti (Finnish), ciocia (Polish), or doda (Hebrew)? There are many ways to say "Auntie" around the world, although it's not always as simple as a direct translation.

The English word aunt derives from the Old French ante. This shares the same root as tante, which is used in French, German, and Dutch today. Another group of related Aunties are zia (Italian), tía (Spanish), and tita (Filipino). Young Spaniards also use tía as a slang term for a girl; Hola tía! is a friendly greeting to your female pal, while a tía buena is a sexy lady!

In Russian, your Auntie is your tjotja, or more familiarly your tetushka. However, these terms extend far beyond the family; your tjotja could be your parent's friend, your friend's parent, your neighbor, or even (especially when used by children) a stranger of the right age. In Japan, you address your Auntie as oba-san, but oba-san is also a respectful term for any middle-aged woman; although you might offend someone by calling her oba-san if she doesn't think she's old enough!

While English uses one word for aunt, some languages have more. The most common distinction is between maternal and paternal sides of the family. In Arabic, your mother's sister is your khaalah and your father's sister is your ammah. In Danish, you can have a faster (father's sister), moster (mother's sister), or tante (uncle's wife or parent's friend). Your Serbian Auntie is your tetka if she's a blood relation on either side of the family, but your ujna is married to your mother's brother while your strina is married to your father's brother.

Malay doesn't differentiate between mother's and father's sides, but it does distinguish between your parent's eldest sister (mak long), youngest sister (mak su), and all the sisters in between. Fortunately Malay has a generic word (mak cik), which can also be used for stepmothers and Aunties by Choice.

Mandarin Chinese has four words: father's sister (gugu), mother's sister (yíma), father's brother's wife (shenshen), and mother's brother's wife (jiùma). Cantonese is even more complicated, distinguishing whether the aunt is related on your mother's or your father's side, and whether she is an older or younger sister or married to an older or younger brother! The Cantonese word for mother's younger sister (ayì) is also used as a more general term.

Many languages of India also have different words for aunts depending on their place in the family. However, Indians commonly use the English word Auntie similarly to the way Russians use tjotja, referring to more distant relatives, friends of parents, and sometimes women they've just met. You might refer to your neighbour as Sunita-Auntie or your doctor as Doctor-Auntie.

In Korean, your mother's sister is your emo, your father's sister your gomo, and your mother's brother's wife your sookmo. However, because your father's older brother is your "big father" (keun appa), his wife becomes your "big mother" (keun umma). It naturally follows that your father's younger brother and wife are your "little father" (jak-eun appa) and "little mother" (jak-eun umma). By contrast, in Swahili your "big mother" (mama mkubwa) and "little mother" (mama mdogo) are your mother's older and younger sisters (the more general Swahili word is shangazi).

Hawaiian, on the other hand, uses the same word (makuahini) for "mother" and "aunt". Among the Lakota people, your father's sister (t'unwín) and your uncle’s wife (t'unwíla) get their own words, but the term for your mother (iná) is also used for your mother's sisters and some of her female cousins. A Hawaiian or Lakota child can have lots of mothers!

But whether Aunties are called tante, khaalah, gugu, or shangazi, they share a common bond: their love for their nieces and nephews.

Photo: phanlop88
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:49:00 GMT


In an interview with ET, Jennifer Lopez discussed the new drama series she produces, The Fosters, which tells the story of a lesbian bi-racial couple who raise both biological and adoptive children together. According to Lopez, “Life can be complicated and messy sometimes, and not simple, and [The Fosters] was really, really a true depiction of family in this day and age.”

While reflecting on the show’s “new kind of family” emphasis, Lopez grew emotional as she thought of the late aunt who inspired her:

I had an aunt who was gay. I lived with her and I loved her. She just passed away from cancer.

I thought of her often when I was thinking about taking on this project, and the prejudices that she faced. She was so much a part of my life. She was my mom’s sister. She was always there for us. She was a great person. She didn’t have her own family. I often wondered if she wanted it. We never talked about it. She just had her life the way it was. [...] [The Fosters] was kind of like a little bit of an homage to her.

When asked if she thought her aunt would be proud of her for this new and potentially controversial undertaking, Lopez answered through tears and a smile, “I think she would be really proud.” With a laugh, Lopez admitted that her aunt would have definitely had a say in the show’s production.

Lopez confessed that she might consider fostering children of her own in the future:

Maybe, maybe. [...] You just never know where life’s going to take you, and that’s, again, a theme of this show. The family you create is sometimes more important than the family you’re born into.

Photo: www.etonline.com
Published: June 4, 2013
]]> Tue, 04 Jun 2013 13:35:00 GMT www.shoeareyou.com

Meghan Cleary is the internationally recognized footwear authority, whose insight on everything from the latest shoe trend to the hottest footwear designs to red carpet stilettos at the Oscars and Emmys, has appeared in more than 4,500 outlets throughout the world. Known for coining her signature trademark phrase, “What your shoes say about you,” in 2005 with the publication of her first book, Meghan has analyzed presidents, world leaders, celebrities, and fashion icons alike with her uncanny insight. Visit www.shoeareyou.com.

So you want to treat your niece or nephew to a little shoe shopping? Here are a few key tips to maximize the fun.

Do

1. Get the right shoe size from their parents before you shop.
And have an idea of how fast your niece or nephew is growing—are they in a growth spurt right now? Or have they leveled out for a moment?

2. Buy a half size larger than they would normally take.
This will give a little wiggle room and your niece or nephew will get some extra mileage out of the fun “kicks” they bought with their special Auntie.

3. Find something that expresses their individual style.
Take time to listen when you shop—what does your niece or nephew like about his or her current shoes? What shoes do they wish they had? They are really telling you who they want to be, not just what they want to wear—especially teenagers. This is the ultimate expression of identity in crucial adolescent years because shoes are the only fashion item affecting how they walk and carry themselves. Hear what they have to say and use the opportunity to connect and be close.

Don’t

1. Don’t feel like you have to be the one to buy something practical.
YOU are the special Auntie, so now’s the time to get something fun and indulge.

2. Don’t spend a million bucks.
There are tons of great, inexpensive shoe brands that pack a punch in the style and fund department. Converse does tons of brightly colored, trendy styles for toddlers to teenagers, both boys and girls. Keds and New Balance do, too.

3. Don’t put down anything your niece or nephew choose—
Even if you don’t like this, their time and choosing something of their own no matter how old they are is a crucial step in growing up. Celebrate it!

Photo: Courtesy of www.zappos.com
Published: May 29, 2013
]]> Wed, 29 May 2013 13:29:00 GMT