Dear Savvy Auntie,

I have a large family, including nine nieces and nine nephews. I must admit I love them all, but I do have favorites and they know who they are and so do the others. What do you do?

Favorite Auntie

Dear Favorite Auntie,

It is completely normal to have favorites; even parents have favorites. I like to call them “sense mode matches.” Let me explain: When a child and a relative (or anyone) take in the world through the same sense channel, they feel a special bond. So, if you need to move your body, you may be kinesthetic and if you have an active niece or nephew they may be as well. It’s a match!

Perhaps your strongest sense is auditory, tactile (how things feel on your body or actual feelings inside), smell, taste or vision; you can find out by taking the test on my website. Then, discover your niece and nephew’s dominant sense modes and if they are not matches with yours, start to speak in their mode’s language. Play games or do activities that cater to their channel, and before you know it, you will have more “favorites” - maybe even nine of them.

Hoping your “matches” increase,

Natalie Robinson Garfield


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