By Colleen Dowd

You have shared great memories and fun experiences with your significant other, but then things went south. Whatever the reason may be, breaking up is hard to do. According to a survey conducted for American Demographics, found that at least one third of Americans have experienced a break up in the last ten years. The effort that you put into a relationship and the whirl of emotions towards the end may leave you feeling drained. When it finally is time to say goodbye, you may not realize the extent of the loss.

Whether you were together for four months or four years, sharing the news with others is never easy. Filling in friends about the split may be comforting since they can relate and support you. However, it may be a bit trickier if you have mutual friends. You don’t need to lose friendships, but simply prepare yourself that your ex may be at group gatherings.

Informing your family of the breakup can be hard as well. The longer you two were together, the more expectations that your family probably had for the relationship. If they really liked your ex, you may face difficult questions about what happened. Your family may be hoping that you two get back together.

For a Savvy Auntie, your young nieces and nephews may be the most difficult people to break the news to. Psychology Today writer Jenna Baddeley sums it up best: “It is in our nature to form bonds with our partners, bonds that resemble those that we formed with our parents. When those bonds break, it hurts.” Not only are we hurt, but young children who usually haven’t seen a break up before may not understand.

Hopefully, your nieces and nephews have examples of what loving, committed relationships are. And since those bonds (of maybe their parents and grandparents) have existed since before they were born, they may not understand what breaking up is.

Sit them down and explain to them that you are no longer with your significant other in language that is appropriate for their age. You don’t need to give them all the details! But be prepared to answer their questions in a way that they can understand. Make sure to reassure them that you still love them and that you are always there for them.

Colleen Dowd is a freelance writer.