Marshmallows and Bedtime Stories
I’m 43 and I still eat marshmallows by the bagful. This practice might stem from the fact we were raised in a fairly regimented household where sweets and even color television were rationed.
As an uncle, I can rebel against my upbringing while delivering joy and memories to a new generation.
In late august I continued my ‘best-uncle quest’ by visiting my niece and nephew. Sitting around watching the kids I marveled at how they continue to grow and develop.
Speech skills and even reasoning have blossomed full-bore and the children who were barely walking a few years ago were now playing golf in the yard and writing notes to their grandparents.
I take full credit for the note-writing as I gave the Winnie-the-Pooh notecards to my niece.
It’s been a constant struggle for me to connect with her and the notecards marked a milestone in my progress. I finally tried to think like a 4-year-old girl and came up with an appropriate gift.
I guess part of the battle of being an uncle is paying attention to age, interest and growth. You also can’t be too strident in trying to interact with some kids.
For example, Libby is shy to a fault. She’s the prototypical cling-machine and was seldom more than nine feet from her mother’s skirt.
A few weeks before this visit, she was the same way. While she’d wave hello to me and mumble my name, she was still the cling master.
In ten days, that all changed...or maybe it was my gift choice. When presented with the notecards she riffled through them with glee. She named all the characters and even thanked me without any prodding.
Score one for the best uncle. Next came converting little Georgie.
He’s more than a year younger than his sister, but has always been a little more outgoing. The challenge with him is attention span. Getting him to pay attention to me for more than 14 seconds is difficult. Or should I say it was difficult.
Maybe it’s the new day-care (his parents put him into a day-care near their new house and it is a more active and populated facility). Or maybe he’s just growing up. But we turned a page the other day.
Mentioning marshmallows early on wasn’t just to indulge myself in reminiscence, it was also to illustrate a point. They’re a fat-free food that’s a self-contained reward for anyone - big and old.
Unbeknownst to me, my brother and his wife have been using marshmallows as a treat for Georgie and I got to reward him during my latest visit.
That was step one. The second step was when reading time approached. The kids always get to choose a book and choose a person to read to them. It’s an added treat when visitors are at the house, but I’d never made the cut.
Perhaps it was the marshmallow bonding, or the gift I brought George (a stuffed gopher that he instantly called a skunk), but I got to read him stories about farm animals and lions and little girls.
I’ll confess that his attention still wandered to the Olympics on TV and to the other people in the room, but I felt more connected than ever with my nephew.
And when I shut the last book, I basked in the imagined spotlight shining on the greatest uncle ever.